patrick.net

At worst, I expected #TheRiseOfSkywalker to be a well made movie that I didn't like or whose story choices I disagreed with. I was not expecting a genuinely bad movie with video game plotting, thin characters, weak action and endless exposition of no consequence. Heartbreaking...

— Scott Mendelson (@ScottMendelson) December 17, 2019

Booger says

Rin says

So let's stop with the Disney bashing. For all intensive purposes, they did the right thing. Let Lucasfilm run itself and it can make money for the parent company w/o needing to micromanage the organization.

Yeah, but once the franchise started losing money, they did nothing.

Officially, only the Solo movie was a flop. In terms of dollar amounts, the others did well, despite all the backlash.

And as a result of Solo's failure, the top brass at Disney did want to slow down the various releases, which the Kennedy clan (I mean cronies) have agreed to.

Unfortunately, Disney execs have exactly one thing in its arsenal and that's to fire Kathleen Kennedy.

Still, look at the record ...

Force Awakens, $2B worldwide gross
Rogue One, $1B worldwide gross
Last Jedi, $1.3B worldwide gross

The bitch has made money for the mother company and thus, unless we see a few more bombs like Solo, she'll be at the helm. Remember, Disney execs are bean counters, not Sci-Fi fans.

NoCoupForYou says

At worst, I expected #TheRiseOfSkywalker to be a well made movie that I didn't like or whose story choices I disagreed with. I was not expecting a genuinely bad movie with video game plotting, thin characters, weak action and endless exposition of no consequence. Heartbreaking...— Scott Mendelson (@ScottMendelson) December 17, 2019

Then let's hope it completely bombs at the box office because that's the only way where Disney will sack Kennedy.

If it makes even $1B due to insipid movie goers who'll see anything on the big screen, then Kathleen will be tenured at Lucasfilm.

Remember, it's a wholly owned subsidiary. If it can pay its own way, Disney will not intervene.

I always thought star wars sucked, the new woke version is pure dog shit.

NuttBoxer says

The stuff with Luke, Rae, and Kylo Ren is where it's at in this movie.

Ok take just one character from the movie and plot their arc during the movie. Example: Rey: She starts by begging Luke to be taught, but he’s an asshole who says the force should go away. So she somehow taps into Force on the island and discovers that she’s kind of dark, and she has a mind meld with Kylo. So she meets up for a date and he seems persuadable when he suddenly switches sides to join her to kill all the bad guys. But fake! Cuz then he switches back because we only wanted to confuse the audience not make a plot point! Then he blows up the Resistance, gets his ship blown up by a crazy cat lady, and then launches an assault on the rest of them. What’s his motivation? Who the fuck can understand it? Rey et all just wanna get away. They eventually do and exit stage left.

That’s it! What was learned? Don’t trust emo boys? The Force is stupid? Who the fuck knows.

Shaman says

That’s it! What was learned? Don’t trust emo boys? The Force is stupid? Who the fuck knows.

Yes, it even makes David Lynch look like a coherent movie maker.

Opening reviews

54% from the critics probably means its fantastic

CovfefeButDeadly says

54% from the critics probably means its fantastic

I'd usually agree, not with this turd.

TrumpingTits says

happened elsewhere in the Disney empire.

I don't know but isn't Pixar holding up pretty well? I mean if it were 'Toy Story' followed by a complete bust then yeah, Disney is a loser caretaker.

Otherwise, for the most part, they're acting just like any other holding company out there but in their case, for entertainment venues instead of let's say software like the loser Computer Associates which does nothing but butcher companies left and right.

If you want a major loser for a holding company, look no further than a GE. If it were GE in place of Disney, I'd say 'yes' Disney ruined X, Y, and Z because GE would send in their goons to destroy the goods.

In this case, Disney simply honored Lucas's wish for retaining Kathleen Kennedy. It was Lucas's fault for allowing this to unfold.

RC2006 says

CovfefeButDeadly says

54% from the critics probably means its fantastic

I'd usually agree, not with this turd.

Probably right. But alot of the critics who don't like the new movie raved about the Last Jedi.

They keep raising the price of tickets to offset the lack of attendance.
That is how they keep breaking Box Office records.

Forbes: "Rise of Skywalker is WORST Star Wars film ever"

https://www.forbes.com/sites/scottmendelson/2019/12/18/review-disney-and-lucasfilms-star-wars-the-rise-of-skywalker-is-a-terrible-end-to-the-skywalker-saga/?utm_source=FACEBOOK&utm_medium=social&utm_term=Valerie%2F&fbclid=IwAR08v-_gqaLKdza7UAvkqfvSLSwK3cmCgLKZcZbRckkfeES70tvRmXjc6YQ#359492d7113c

Goran_K says

Forbes: "Rise of Skywalker is WORST Star Wars film ever"

Reading his review gives me hope it will be better.

The reviewer seems mostly pissed that Abrams had to fix alot of the bullshit plot points in the last 2 movies and tries to tie it back to the original trilogy.

Rin says

Force Awakens, $2B worldwide gross
Rogue One, $1B worldwide gross
Last Jedi, $1.3B worldwide gross

They paid well over $4B for the Franchise. So, when you consider production costs, marketing, etc... Disney probably hasn't broken even years after the purchase. They were hoping I'm sure for a lot more. We do know the Merch sales have been seriously underwhelming, to the point they even braved SJW screeching by removing the Asian chick from new imprints.

They wanted to get rid of Kennedy a long time ago, but can't because she's literally considered the top female Hollywood Executive right now.

NoCoupForYou says

They paid well over $4B for the Franchise. So, they've barely broken even. They were hoping I'm sure for a lot more.

They made $4B in a four year span.

In other words, if the deal was floated with bonds (which most companies use for M&As or for build outs like Verizon's Fiber network), they have more than enough to pay the bondholders, since they don't have to pay off everything upfront, with a lot leftover for general business operations. And yes, if Kennedy churns up to a $1B per year, it's highly unlikely that she'll be asked to leave.

The way out is for each SW film to be Solo-redux, a $300M+ dud which will promptly put Kathleen in the "See ya, don't want to be ya" pile.

So let's pray for the 'Rise of Skywalker' to be the greatest failure of all time!

Rin says

They made $4B in a four year span.

Gross, not including various costs.

I'm sure Disney isn't going to go bankrupt over Star Wars, but they certainly didn't make a killing on it, in fact I suspect they're way off from the amount they hoped to make.

Rin says

So let's pray for the 'Rise of Skywalker' to be the greatest failure of all time!

Sure looks that way!

Interesting female mentality: The male hero becomes better through training, suffering, adversity; the female heroine is innately perfect and the world simply needs to recognize it.

Shaman says

Example: Rey:

You then spend the next paragraph talking about Kylo Ren. But you still feel qualified to judge..

Kylo Ren killing Snoke is nothing new. Happened with almost every Sith pair, though Vader killing Palpatine was different motivation. Remember the Rule of Two. Which means Rey would have gone to the darkside had she agreed. Kylo was originally trained as Jedi, and his internal conflict is clear throughout the series(just like with Vader).

Again, don't see what was so hard to follow.

Merchandising campaign: lesbos with purple hair dilding each other with kiddies' plastic light sabers.

But who hired and approved everything she did?

FortWayneIndiana says

But who hired and approved everything she did?

First of all, the parent company does not manage the wholly owned subsidiary. Realize, this is not GE, where its bozo C-suite muck with anything they buy.

In other words, Disney's execs don't have to approve of any of her day to day actions w/o some prior clearance from them.

In effect, the board hired her under Lucas's guidance during the whole deal where he wanted to 'preserve the Star Wars' universe in return for the sale of the franchise.

The person who betrayed Lucas was Kennedy, not Disney's bean counters.


NoCoupForYou says

in fact I suspect they're way off from the amount they hoped to make.

I think for the most part, they're ok with years 1 to 4 because in effect, they've seen a blockbuster per year till the Solo debacle. I mean one can't always expect the Marvel series mega blockbusters to reproduce itself in Star Wars and in the same way with multiple movies serials.

So here's the thing, let 'Rise of Skywalker' fail and then, we'll see a change at Lucasfilm's helm. Until then, all bets are off.

NuttBoxer says

But you still feel qualified to judge..

Look, most people are like you: wouldn’t know the good from the bad if it smacked them in the face with its lady penis.
I happen to be cursed with a more literary bent, which means I’m always ruining perfectly popular movies for people with my snobbish insistence on character arcs, story telling, and consistence in basic physics. NuttBoxer says

Resistance takes down Drednaught(pretty cool),

So you thought that part was cool? When they were flying through fucking SPACE (which has no gravity) but still had to get their space bombers literally OVER the dreadnaught to DROP bombs that look like WWII era bombs onto it using the gravity that doesn’t exist? Oh but an intersectional character sacrificed herself to do it so it works!
Fuck!

Shaman says

Oh but an intersectional character sacrificed herself to do it so it works!

the story was written by lib art major millennial SJWs.

Shaman says

NuttBoxer says

Resistance takes down Drednaught(pretty cool),

So you thought that part was cool? When they were flying through fucking SPACE (which has no gravity) but still had to get their space bombers literally OVER the dreadnaught to DROP bombs that look like WWII era bombs onto it using the gravity that doesn’t exist? Oh but an intersectional character sacrificed herself to do it so it works!

First of all, the name 'Dreadnought' is already reminiscent of the huge battleships between the UK and Germany during the WWI (and II) eras and thus, the entire setup was to replay that whole bombing away of a supersized vessel in the absence of any localized gravity.

Yes, it was an anachronistic attempt at showing Poe to be a loose cannon, sacrificing lives in return for one sunken supersized Bismarck vessel.

I'm kind of with NuttB on this one. I think you guys are looking a bit too much into a movie. Enjoy it or don't. It's fiction. You can make up anything you want.

I get the SJW angle, but they're just trying to make a movie that will appeal to the largest audience. Men, even the one's bitching about the movie here, are already locked into Star Wars. You know you're going to watch this movie in some format and Disney will make money off it. If they can get women more interested in Star Wars, that's a shit load more money. Star Wars has never been about making GOOD movies if you're being objective. It's just business.

WookieMan says

You know you're going to watch this movie in some format

Nope, I can get the full summary from wikipedia and the highlights from someone making clips on the 'net, criticizing the segments. I will not watch this movie and thus, Disney Inc/Lucasfilm won't get a penny out of me.

WookieMan says

It's just business.

That's why I want a Solo like failure to torpedo the Kathleen Kennedy Dreadnought.

WookieMan says

If they

One more time, there's not this 'they' in this fiasco.

It's a singular person with the name of Kathleen Kennedy. It's a 'she' and yes, 'she' thinks she can get more women interested in Star Wars by turning it into a Femi-Nazi/SJW propaganda piece than a Sci-Fi drama about plausibility and a hero's or heroine's journey.

Rin says

WookieMan says

You know you're going to watch this movie in some format

Nope, I can get the full summary from wikipedia and the highlights from someone making clips on the 'net, criticizing the segments. I will not watch this movie and thus, Disney Inc/Lucasfilm won't get a penny out of me.

After the abortion of a film that last one was, i have lost what little interest in the series I ever had. It was always silly pulp fiction, more of a space western than anything else. But what made it WORK was Lucas’ strict adherence to Joseph Campbell’s “Hero’s Journey” story structure. It told an age old story of a young man’s quest for significance, to right a dystopian wrong, to battle oppression as he comes into his natural gifts through hard work and sacrifice, helped along with an older mentor. In the second original film, we learned that the great evil Luke was fighting was a product of his own origin story, that he would have to resist a generational ideology to seek the good...or accept it and lose all chance to change things for the better.
And the third was a story of redemption.
I actually liked the prequels, the third most of all because it showed how a passionate young man with boundless talent could be seduced with impossible choices into choosing the darkest evil over the noble...how blind adherence to fleeting cares could lead one to ultimate destruction.
It was a damned good story, if a bit dark. And it neatly set the stage for the original trilogy, making Luke’s journey all the more impactful as he worked to redeem his wayward father.
Compared to that sort of masterful storytelling, the last trilogy is a mashup mess, and not worth watching. The first one was long on nostalgia, short on the Hero’s Journey. Rey just appears and is perfect from the start. She don’t need training... she just is a master Jedi already as soon as she is told she is. So lame.

Then don't watch it. Not sure what else to say. It's likely to gross $1B worldwide like the others have. Kathleen Kennedy will likely not go anywhere (I'm not a supporter). They will still sell toys and Disneyland(world) tickets on the back of the movie to the tune of $120/pp to get into the theme park.

Lucasfilm will be like buying a $100k house today and it being worth $10M in 20 years. This is about money. No one in corporate cares about a storyline and most productions don't. They just hire the highest paid hunk or most titty inflated bad actress to star in their films. Movies have sucked for a decade now, maybe longer. I'm talking about everyone here, not just Disney. Movies suck. Netflix (Amazon, etc) type series' is where most the talent and good content has gone.

I'll see this one Monday afternoon with my kids and 6 beers (wife is driving). I'll give my honest report then.

WookieMan says

It's likely to gross $1B worldwide like the others have

Solo didn't and that's my hope.

WookieMan says

They will still sell toys

Actually, toy sales have come nowhere close to either of the first two trilogies.

WookieMan says

No one in corporate cares about a storyline

See my point about Solo and why I hope for 'Rise of Skywalker' to replay.

WookieMan says

titty inflated bad actress

I like tits and Rey doesn't have 'em.

Let me show you how one makes money on tits ...

Shaman says

So you thought that part was cool? When they were flying through fucking SPACE (which has no gravity)

So you watch Star Wars expecting Kubrick's 2001!? I guess you also don't like Friday because it's not more like Boyz in da Hood? The comparison is ridiculous, and no critic would even attempt it. This is obviously just an excuse for you, and other bitter men to retaliate at a franchise because of your issues with women.

Go poke holes in The Good, The Bad and The Ugly for the unrealistic shooting scenes. Or Pulp Fiction for almost every scene. Totally unrealistic movies, so they must be trash..

Who added gay shit into last episode? Is it still Kathleen Kennedy?

Rin says

I like tits and Rey doesn't have 'em.

Would you not fuck her though??

WookieMan says

Rin says

I like tits and Rey doesn't have 'em.

Would you not fuck her though??

I wouldn't and that's because I'm not some 17 year old who's never laid pipe before.

Remember, I'd been with French-Canadian babes so my standards are a bit higher than some guy pining over a lost love back in school. I believe Rey is suppose to represent that college aged upstart.

Hmm. There's a thought. Instead of adding extra scenes years later they just enhance Rey's TnA. It might make a profit!

I saw the movie yesterday.

No spoilers.

I really enjoyed it and think It is easily the best of the new movies and prequels. It fixes alot of Rian Johnson's mess and the overall story arc makes sense and was satisfying to me. There was no overtly feminist or SJW shit that I could tell (geesh - low bar!). It was a really fun and fast moving movie. They could have made it into 2 movies.

Thanks for the review socal2.
Anyone else take the plunge? I really don’t trust paid critic reviewers. Bunch of sissy idiots.

socal2 says

I saw the movie yesterday.

No spoilers.

I really enjoyed it and think It is easily the best of the new movies and prequels. It fixes alot of Rian Johnson's mess and the overall story arc makes sense and was satisfying to me. There was no overtly feminist or SJW shit that I could tell (geesh - low bar!). It was a really fun and fast moving movie. They could have made it into 2 movies.

Is it true they had homosexual scene at the end with women kissing?

Ok, opening weekend is over and it's grossed some ~$376M worldwide.

In other words, it's not a flop and Kathleen Kennedy gets to keep her job.