Letting kids roam and hurt themselves and fostering their ability to gauge their skills correctly and assessing safety
2023 Aug 20, 12:38pm 798 views 2 comments
by mell follow (12)
One of my buddies has raised his only kid with the philosophy that she needs to get down wherever she climbs up on the playground and said she learned very quickly to keep safe and enhanced her climbing skills. Tried that today with the 2 year old and he was hanging down on one arm at some point from a play structure. The fall could have caused a bruise or two but was certainly not hospital worthy let alone life threatening as it wasn't very high and the ground padded (damage more likely from surrounding climbing bars/plates than the fall). He hadn't asked for help yet but admittedly likely would have fallen eventually, but before I could react a Mexican dude playing with his at least 8 year old son intervened and grabbed my kid and started the shaming. I believe he had well intentions so I thanked him repeatedly til he calmed down. It's an interesting dilemma but I can see now why kids these days become stupid and unfit for any sorts of street smarts, raised inside a safety bubble, seeking higher and higher risks while banking on someone to bail them out of every occasion and never to blame for misjudging their abilities, thus never learning.
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WookieMan
2023 Aug 20, 12:56pm
WookieMan
2023 Aug 20, 12:56pm
mell says
I leave at 5:30am M-Sat. School has started. Wife travels occasionally. I leave the house and they fucking figure it out. Wake up, make breakfast, get your shit ready and get to school. If you're tardy or miss you're gonna lose some privileges. 10/11/13 (edit: ages)
Today's parents "think" they have to be there for every waking moment. I don't go to baseball practices for example, they ride their bikes. My nephew who lives with us broke his arm. Field was a 3 minute drive from the house. I took 10. I get there and walk 100 yards and have a mom yelling me to pull my car up like I'm a god damn EMT. I asked her, "did he break his leg?" That pissed her off. I'm like he can walk to the car. It hurts. Everyone gets hurt.
We have some friends with older kids going off to college. The moms and even some dads with their crocodile tears that their kid is going off to school. Good fucking riddance. Grad a beer and celebrate you raised a kid that should have a future and you now get the house back. Life could be worse and you have a heroin addict as a kid. A broken bone is better than a lot of alternatives in life.
Your kids will learn to resent you if you're up their ass 24/7. And frankly who has time for that? Give them structure, discipline and a certain level of freedom and you generally can't go wrong. If you focus too much on one of those areas it goes to or can go to shit quickly. My parenting 2¢.
It's an interesting dilemma but I can see now why kids these days become stupid and unfit for any sorts of street smarts, raised inside a safety bubble, seeking higher amd higher risks while banking on someone to bail them out of every occasion and never to blame for misjudging their abilities, thus never learning.
I leave at 5:30am M-Sat. School has started. Wife travels occasionally. I leave the house and they fucking figure it out. Wake up, make breakfast, get your shit ready and get to school. If you're tardy or miss you're gonna lose some privileges. 10/11/13 (edit: ages)
Today's parents "think" they have to be there for every waking moment. I don't go to baseball practices for example, they ride their bikes. My nephew who lives with us broke his arm. Field was a 3 minute drive from the house. I took 10. I get there and walk 100 yards and have a mom yelling me to pull my car up like I'm a god damn EMT. I asked her, "did he break his leg?" That pissed her off. I'm like he can walk to the car. It hurts. Everyone gets hurt.
We have some friends with older kids going off to college. The moms and even some dads with their crocodile tears that their kid is going off to school. Good fucking riddance. Grad a beer and celebrate you raised a kid that should have a future and you now get the house back. Life could be worse and you have a heroin addict as a kid. A broken bone is better than a lot of alternatives in life.
Your kids will learn to resent you if you're up their ass 24/7. And frankly who has time for that? Give them structure, discipline and a certain level of freedom and you generally can't go wrong. If you focus too much on one of those areas it goes to or can go to shit quickly. My parenting 2¢.
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