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How I became Hispanic


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2021 May 11, 9:29am   395 views  14 comments

by Patrick   ➕follow (55)   💰tip   ignore  

https://spectator.us/topic/became-hispanic-dna-test-sephardim/

Several years ago I applied for a teaching position in an American university. In response I received a lot of forms to fill out, including one that required me to identify my ‘ethnicity or race’. ...

When I look at myself in the mirror, I see, even with a summer tan, a very white man. So I assumed it would be a waste of time to fill in the part about race on the form the university had sent me. Nevertheless, I was curious to find out how ‘Hispanics’ were defined since one of my best friends, a son of immigrants from Cuba, was classified as Hispanic.

The man was even whiter than me. And he was unable to respond when I used the few words I know in Ladino, the Judeo-Spanish still spoken by Sephardim — Jews of Spanish or Portuguese descent — whose families were expelled from the Iberian Peninsula in 1492. I am a proud member of that tribe, which includes renowned figures such as Benjamin Disraeli, not to mention Pfizer’s Albert Bourla. Why shouldn’t they, and yours truly, be classified as Hispanics?

According to the US Census Bureau, a Hispanic or Latino is a ‘person of Cuban, Mexican, Puerto Rican, South or Central American, or other Spanish culture or origin regardless of race’. I belong to the exclusive sect of Sephardim Tehorim (literally ‘pure Sephardim’): that sounds Grade-A Hispanic. ...

So I consulted an immigration lawyer. He explained that yes, Señor Leon Hadar was indeed a pure Hispanic, and when he applied for a job in academia, he should, as per the immutable laws of affirmative action, be favored over your average white man...

Isn’t the Hispanic thing one big scam? The term makes even less sense than ‘Slavic American’, which assumes that Croats and Serbs, who would happily wage war on one another in the ruins of the Old Country...

The term ‘Hispanic’ didn’t exist until the 1970s. Mexican Americans identified as ‘Chicanos’ and Puerto Ricans as, well, Puerto Ricans. That’s why Leonard Bernstein (not Sephardi) had them singing ‘I wanna be an American’ in West Side Story, not ‘I wanna be a Hispanic.’ ...

In America the Hispanic and Latino tags are based on the fairy tale that the Argentinian-Italian millionaire, the Cuban-American middle-class businessman, and the poor migrant from Honduras are all ‘brown’ people historically oppressed by ‘the Anglos’. It’s manna from heaven for political activists: in the name of representing millions of newly discovered Hispanic Americans, they squeeze financial aid from the government and the big corporations, and get nominated for top government positions. ...

During the 2020 elections, contrary to the fantasies concocted by the Democrats, many of those ‘brown’ Americans were so engrossed by macho man and all-round bad hombre Donald Trump that, like other traditional Catholics repelled by the Democrats’ secular-liberal agenda, they cast their ballots for Republican candidates.

You are probably dying to know if I ended up identifying as Hispanic when I applied for that university teaching post. I didn’t. I just couldn’t imagine the head of the admission committee welcoming me as ‘Señor Hadar’. Perhaps this was a mistake: I didn’t get the job. Next time, I’ll remember to be Latinx.

Comments 1 - 14 of 14        Search these comments

1   clambo   2021 May 11, 11:35am  

My friend in Santa Cruz has Portuguese ancestry.

I told him to find free shit available to "latinos/Hispanics"
2   Ceffer   2021 May 11, 11:51am  

I've told this story before. College friend with average grades was Portuguese/Yugoslavian with hispanic sounding (albeit Portuguese) last name. Got into professional school, and was even in charge of the minority students association for a year. He dyed his hair darker and used makeup to darken his skin for the interview.

His father was wealthy and owned grocery stores and liquor stores in the East Bay.

I have to admit, however, from what I have seen, that a competent pretender is preferable to an idiotic, barely present true minority being pushed and shoved beyond capabilities to graduation. My friend always did well in his professional life.
3   mbSFBay   2021 May 11, 12:07pm  

By this same token, if one is Asian American (Indian Americans included), you get the other end of the stick.
4   Rin   2021 May 11, 12:18pm  

It's even more pathetic that that.

I know a white woman whose dad was the son of a British descended Texan oil millionaire. Ok, she never had a single money issue her whole life.

Her mom, however, was a fair skinned Latina and upon marrying her dad, after he sold off his equity in Big Oil, retired to Mexico, keeping his family's house in Dallas, and another place in Massachusetts.

Well, she won minority scholarships to both Harvard and Columbia and believe it or not, was asked to leave the Big H with a terminal masters because her work was completely substandard for her dept/program. Yes, she flunked out but to save face, HU gave her a masters.

Seriously, aren't there enough ppl out there, who'd kill to get a chance at any one of HU's grad programs?
5   Ceffer   2021 May 11, 12:49pm  

I hired an Indian Brahmin girl in my office for a while. I didn't know it at the time. Her family was ne plus wealthy. I couldn't figure why she would work there. Her manufactured resume made her sound like Tomb Raider with three Phd's.

She was a total klutz. She was fascinated with my competence and became a bit obsessed with me. I had no problem doing all of the office duties when necessary, but she was very upset when she saw me emptying garbage, cleaning the bathroom, or picking things off the floor.

Her parents visited, met with the dean of a private professional school, and next day she was miraculously accepted into a program (money sliding across the table?). She didn't measure up, but finally completed a much lesser professional program.

She had been married to a really abusive, supercilious, nasty Indian man, and I guess such marriages can be dissolved, because she got a divorce while working for me.

She kept calling me even after leaving the office, but I stopped talking with her because quite frankly I was afraid of her family.

I drove her home once to a large estate with gate in the Hayward hills when she was still married, and she apologized to me for living in such a modest home.
6   Rin   2021 May 11, 2:45pm  

Ceffer says
Her parents visited, met with the dean of a private professional school, and next day she was miraculously accepted into a program (money sliding across the table?). She didn't measure up, but finally completed a much lesser professional program.


Ok, but she's South Asian and thus, needed to bribe admissions because her family never got a Mailboxes etc address in Mexico City, which would have made her Hispanic by location alone. This is no different than Jared Kushner's admissions to Harvard, since he's an idiot w/ billionaire parents.

FYI, I know of Jose Changs and Carlos Fung, who've played the Hispanic card to avoid the Asian-American label. In other words, their parents spent time in South America before Uncle Sam.
7   Shaman   2021 May 11, 3:01pm  

What’s to stop any white man from:
1)Changing his name to something Latin sounding, preferably with a “z” at the end.
2)growing a mustache
3)Dying his skin a nice light brown.

I’ll bet that most white men could easily pass for Mexican if they made those changes. And college admission or job applications would be a breeze. Gavin Newsome would give them free money!
8   AmericanKulak   2021 May 11, 3:19pm  

Engelberto Humplegringo!

Seriously though, Asians are advised to change their last names to Chanstein or Lee or Rajiguez.
9   Rin   2021 May 11, 3:56pm  

Shaman says
1)Changing his name to something Latin sounding, preferably with a “z” at the end.
2)growing a mustache
3)Dying his skin a nice light brown.


A Mailboxes etc will do.

The other stuff is unnecessary as it's just an attempt at overstating the obvious and that's that there's no distinction between a pure-bred white person of Argentina, whose parents came from Germany/Austria vs a Mestizo.

So yes, Herr Carlos Gunter is an oppressed white Hispanic minority.
10   FortwayeAsFuckJoeBiden   2021 May 11, 8:24pm  

Shaman says
What’s to stop any white man from:
1)Changing his name to something Latin sounding, preferably with a “z” at the end.
2)growing a mustache
3)Dying his skin a nice light brown.

I’ll bet that most white men could easily pass for Mexican if they made those changes. And college admission or job applications would be a breeze. Gavin Newsome would give them free money!


Why change when you can self-identify as anything?
11   komputodo   2021 May 11, 8:58pm  

Ceffer says
I drove her home once to a large estate with gate in the Hayward hills

Was it MC Hammers old crib?
12   FortwayeAsFuckJoeBiden   2021 May 12, 6:46am  

Race is a choice. Article mostly about Kamala, but has interesting points on perception of race and that perception gets manipulated during elections.

https://link.theepochtimes.com/mkt_app/race-is-a-choice_3811878.html
13   RWSGFY   2021 May 12, 8:02am  

I went ahead and changed my "race" in the HR system to "Hispanic". Considering changing sex to "non-binary" but haven't done that yet.
14   Patrick   2021 May 27, 9:51am  

You can also become a woman now just by saying you are one!

https://twitter.com/Not_the_Bee/status/1397373841903689730

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