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Well this is one way to do a for sale by owner


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2012 Jul 20, 4:06am   15,614 views  25 comments

by leo707   ➕follow (1)   💰tip   ignore  

http://www.greatfamilyhome.com/index.html

Beyond the amusing marketing, I wish that every home for sale had this much info on it.

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1   Patrick   2012 Jul 20, 4:13am  

Really well done!

As the sign suggests..... we offer for sale, our wonderful, cozy, slightly-retro bungalow located just a stones throw from the heart of Portland, in Beaverton, Oregon.

We did everything right. Married ten years. Two kids: one perfect boy, one bouncy, perfect baby girl. We had almost no debt outside of our cars and we bought a house.... but, as with many marriages, our story ends in divorce. I'm not sure how this all happened... but, all I can is that as soon as your husband/wife starts using new texts languages like :/, or starts talking to you like a college kid.... check your phone bill - you're probably going to be in for a surprise. For me that surprise came in the form of a 22 year old college student who likes yoga... and, other people's husbands.

Well, I liked him too .... and I'm sure one day I'll like him again. lol - So, I guess I can't blame her too much, right?

This whole thing happened so fast (started in March, 2012), and while it has been the darkest hours of my life so far, it has also been filled with wonderful friends, neighbors and family who have helped in so many ways. It's the death of my marriage and the family I had as I knew it... but, that's all. I know that sounds crazy, but at some point you have to put the brakes on and realize that worse things are happening to someone else right now as you're reading this. As my wise Grandmother always say's, "Jews in Auschwitz would love to have your problems....". And she's right (aren't Grandma's always right?). This isn't the worse that could happen to me. Sure I'm angry, and every bit as sad as the sign suggests... but I'm also equally grateful for the life I do have and I know that the best the way to more forward for all of us is to focus on that. Hence my quirky marketing For Sale By Owner plan. :)

2   leo707   2012 Jul 20, 4:17am  

I wonder though when the NAR is going to send her a cease and desist for not using the ® after Realtor®.

Realtor Type Facts

Beds: 3
Baths: 1
Sqft: 1,144*
...

3   PockyClipsNow   2012 Jul 20, 4:28am  

I could use some tips about how to bag a 22 yo.

4   Patrick   2012 Jul 20, 4:37am  

Apparently you should take a yoga class!

5   TechGromit   2012 Jul 20, 5:03am  

At my age the only way I'm hooking up with a 22 year old girl is with Chloroform and duct tape. :)

6   B.A.C.A.H.   2012 Jul 20, 5:13am  

Techie,
You ought to be very careful about sharing such thoughts you have on the internet.

TechGromit says

At my age the only way I'm hooking up with a 22 year old girl is with Chloroform and duct tape. :)

7   leo707   2012 Jul 20, 6:42am  

If I was single I don't think I would want to date the type of person who would date someone almost twice their age.

8   zzyzzx   2012 Jul 20, 10:16am  


Really well done!

I'd say that the husband did pretty well.

9   PockyClipsNow   2012 Jul 20, 10:19am  

Yoga class! of course!

But how not to pass gas during the relaxation? Thats a deal killer right there.

12   Patrick   2012 Jul 20, 10:27am  

Yes, I've heard that yoga classes are very farty, not only because of the positions, but also because the class is filled with vegetarian bean and lentil-eating types.

Good to know there is a technological solution. Should be required attire.

13   CrazyMan   2012 Jul 20, 10:30am  

Lucky guy :)

B.A.C.A.H. says

Techie,
You ought to be very careful about sharing such thoughts you have on the internet.

You're kinda new to the whole internet thing and how it works exactly, aren't you ;)

14   PockyClipsNow   2012 Jul 20, 10:33am  

1. Sign up for Yoga class
2. Don the 'NoFartyPants' pants.
3. Bag a 22 yo!

THANK YOU EVERYONE!

15   CrazyMan   2012 Jul 20, 10:34am  

You should probably be thin and good looking too.

/sorry to burst your bubble

16   PockyClipsNow   2012 Jul 20, 10:35am  

Also its probaby best to shut the eff up about RE, the fed reserve, and intrest rates around a 22 yo.

(yet another tip!)

17   leo707   2012 Jul 20, 10:38am  

CrazyMan says

You should probably be thin and good looking too.

That can easily be replaced by simply being rich.

Well, I guess he does look thin...

18   CrazyMan   2012 Jul 20, 10:42am  

Indeed, rich works too.

I know this is morbid, but when she died I remembered thinking to myself "well, she finally got her wish to be thin".

19   PockyClipsNow   2012 Jul 20, 10:58am  

And they lived happily ever after!

20   Patrick   2012 Jul 20, 11:04am  

I admire Anna Nicole Smith. She knew exactly what she was doing.

And I've heard that J. Howard Marshall died laughing, because he knew what he was doing too. He just wanted to piss off the family members that were hungrily waiting for their inheritance.

21   HEY YOU   2012 Jul 20, 5:44pm  

I stopped clicking like. I enjoyed all the comments.

22   Dan8267   2012 Jul 22, 5:25am  

Size: 1,144 sq. ft.
Built: 1949
Lot Size: 0.17 acres
Taxes: $2,108.00/yr
Location: Oregon
Price: $169,000

I'd rather have the 22-year-old co-ed.

Size: 36C
Built: 1990
Butt Size: petite
Downside: Like the house, she's a rapidly depreciating asset. Best to rent.

23   Dan8267   2012 Jul 22, 5:34am  

PockyClipsNow says

I could use some tips about how to bag a 22 yo.


Apparently you should take a yoga class!

Oh, yoga! I've been taking Yoda classes.

http://www.youtube.com/embed/M403RsjXwRk

24   zzyzzx   2012 Jul 22, 11:10pm  

robertoaribas says

I love Yoga.

Has doing the yoga thing worked for you yet? How many 22 year olds have you bagged so far from yoga?

25   zzyzzx   2012 Jul 22, 11:11pm  

leoj707 says

If I was single I don't think I would want to date the type of person who would date someone almost twice their age.

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