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Landlord Stories


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2022 May 12, 8:53am   5,247 views  49 comments

by BayArea   ➕follow (1)   💰tip   ignore  

I have a bunch of them but here goes one.

I rented a condo to a 50-something guy that was moving to Oakland (Rockridge) for work from the east coast. He lived in the unit for 5yrs.

I get a call from him one Saturday morning saying the kitchen sink is backed up and the disposal isn’t working.

At the time I was managing the unit. I show up to find the garbage disposal completely full to the top with orange peels and watermelon husks.

I look at the guy to see if I could find a trace of common sense in his eyes. I replace the disposal and inform him that this is not a commercial grade disposal and items like that must go in the trash.

That was one small example why I’m no longer a landlord.

I have many stories but interested to hearing yours as well.

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28   FortWayneAsNancyPelosiHaircut   2022 May 13, 9:31am  

Booger says

BayArea says

I rented to a gay couple once

Boy did they make a lot of nit-picky calls on things.

Also, at lease renewal time they would always remind me of how much rent they paid in the year and used that as reason why each year they should get something like new appliances or carpet.

Fuck you


I would have guessed that gays would make good tenants because they didn't have kids wrecking the place.


it really depends. the couple a friend of mine rented to were fucking insane. they did weird sexual shit. they drew all kinds of sick shit on the walls, made a hole in one that looked like for a very unique purpose. they did a lot of drugs too, so house had a smell to it. some people are fucking sick. not your average homos I guess.
29   B.A.C.A.H.   2022 May 13, 9:52am  

FortWayneAsNancyPelosiHaircut says
the couple a friend of mine rented to were fucking insane


During college I had a gay roommate. I didn't realize he was gay till I'd lived there nearly a year. Because, I suppose, I was (am) a social retard. This was in the mid-1980's, in Silicon Valley (SF Bay Area) when AIDs was becoming a huge crisis. Rock Hudson, etc.

I did not think he was gay. He owned a huge home in the foothills of the Valley, with a "Valley View". He said that in the divorce agreement with his wife, he kept the house but needed to rent out the four spare bedrooms to be able to afford to keep the place. The story about the ex-wife was not just a "story", - I met her a few times as it was an amicable divorce. The thought of him being gay never crossed my mind.

But lots of weird sh*t going on, all the time. Me and two of the other roommates all sort of figured it out around the same time, after a Wild Halloween Party. We sort of panicked and moved out once we figured it out, because during that time it was still not known how AIDs is transmitted.
30   Eric Holder   2022 May 13, 10:02am  

Booger says

B.A.C.A.H. says
Where I live in California many (most?) water heaters are in the garage.


Being in the Northeast, the concept of a water heater not in a basement is foreign to me.


Being in California the concept of a basement is foreign to me. =))
31   komputodo   2022 May 13, 10:03am  

Hircus says

FJB says

Short term maui vacation rental: Someone bent one of my frying pans into the shape of a taco. They did a great job too! It was very symmetrical with no dents, paint chips etc.


Was it worn out? I'm thinking maybe they saw teflon chips, and decided to break it to force replacement for the sake of future users.

yeah im sure that was the reason because in your world, tenants are always worried about the future health and safety of the next tenant
32   Eric Holder   2022 May 13, 10:05am  

FortWayneAsNancyPelosiHaircut says
those people are fucking sick in the head.


The wouldn't be homos if they weren't.
33   Eric Holder   2022 May 13, 10:10am  

AmericanKulak says
Some 50 something fat Government Employee Black Woman stopped paying after first month, accused all her neighbors including my 70-sometihng mom and her 90-year old Cuban Great Grandmother neighbor - of making noise at 3AM when both are long since passed out. Oh, and the divorced single 50 something old Dentist who works on Travel Contract 3 weeks of every month and isn't even there. She also wanted them not to open the patio/balcony door at 10AM because she "Worked from home and was too loud". This building is Concrete and Steel, and 2 of the 3 apartments have laminated floors with soundproofing, the other has thick carpet.


Happened to me when I was living in a concrete appt building in a big city: one day a grumpy woman shows up at my dor claiming that she lives below me and can't sleep because my 50 lbs dog makes too much noise by running around all night. Weird thing is: the fucking cunt isn't even my downstairs neighbor - she fucking lived in the apartment located diagonally from mine, i.e. no shared floor/ceiling at all.
34   Hircus   2022 May 13, 10:35am  

komputodo says

Hircus says

FJB says

Short term maui vacation rental: Someone bent one of my frying pans into the shape of a taco. They did a great job too! It was very symmetrical with no dents, paint chips etc.


Was it worn out? I'm thinking maybe they saw teflon chips, and decided to break it to force replacement for the sake of future users.

yeah im sure that was the reason because in your world, tenants are always worried about the future health and safety of the next tenant


I knew a girl who used to destroy her moms cookware when she visited because she would otherwise keep it too long past the point where they started flaking badly. I also heard her tell other people to watch out for flaking when we were a guest and they were cooking for us.

Some people care. I guess the possibility of that is just beyond you.
35   NuttBoxer   2022 May 13, 10:39am  

The one thing I know about health, is no one wants to hear my fucking advise,no matter how good it is. Maybe in the case of family you can argue for destroying pans, but where does it end? When you smash their radiation emitting smartphone? When you throw ALL their food in the garbage because it's full of pesticides and GMO's...
36   Ceffer   2022 May 13, 10:46am  

Amazing that people go through their entire lives this way, or until some PO'd victim does them in. Life is short, ugly, ethic-less and stupid with tongue lolling temporary gratifications as dangling carrot motivations.

My wife saw an ad in local paper from the 'slip and fall' sue lady in our development in Santa Cruz. In the day, she and her boyfriend traveled across country posing 'slip and fall' lawsuits against shopping malls. The courts must have lifted her ban, because she is advertising for somebody to 'help' her with tasks because she claims to be an invalid. We think she is just looking for somebody else to sue. Somebody will charge in to be a kind, helpful soul and will wind up in court on the business end of one of her extortion suits. She'll probably serve some daft LibbyFuck right. She has social services in her place all the time helping her, anyway, and likely also serving as her drug courier, so she is likely just searching for sources of money.

Yes, she tried suing our development for not having adequate handicapped access but lost. She also tried suing her proximate neighbors for cats wandering around, and had some shill lawyer attempt to declare her yard a 'bird sanctuary'.
37   Hircus   2022 May 13, 11:11am  

NuttBoxer says
but where does it end


Wherever you want it to end? Just because you try to watch out for a someone else one time doesn't meant you suddenly need to adhere to some arbitrary pact of ideological and behavioral consistency.

It's ok to help a stranger and warn or save them from some random thing you perceive to be a hazard or pitfall. In fact it's not uncommon. It doesn't need to be over analyzed, nor does it obligate you to future actions.

Maybe neither of us would destroy frying pans in such a situation, but I do think most people have arbitrary "things" that they care about for whatever reason.
38   zzyzzx   2022 May 13, 11:38am  

B.A.C.A.H. says

During college I had a gay roommate. I didn't realize he was gay till I'd lived there nearly a year.


Quoted for posterity.
39   zzyzzx   2022 May 13, 11:40am  

Eric Holder says
Being in California the concept of a basement is foreign to me. =))


You are missing out! I am adding you story to my long list of reasons not to move to California.
40   Ceffer   2022 May 13, 11:42am  

zzyzzx says
During college I had a gay roommate. I didn't realize he was gay till I'd lived there nearly a year.

LOL! Nobody 'knew' in MSM that Michael Obama was a man until Joan River committed suicide over it.
41   Eric Holder   2022 May 13, 12:00pm  

zzyzzx says

Eric Holder says
Being in California the concept of a basement is foreign to me. =))


You are missing out! I am adding you story to my long list of reasons not to move to California.


Au contrare, my friend: not having a basement gives me opportunity to point out to my kids, that livinig in my basement as adults IS NOT A FUCKING OPTION for them. :)
42   Ceffer   2022 May 13, 12:03pm  

It's kind of hard to live in the concrete slab of Mom's crap shack. Of course, a crawl space will do in a pinch, as long as the raccoons don't mind.
43   BayArea   2022 May 13, 2:25pm  

Booger says

BayArea says

I rented to a gay couple once

Boy did they make a lot of nit-picky calls on things.

Also, at lease renewal time they would always remind me of how much rent they paid in the year and used that as reason why each year they should get something like new appliances or carpet.

Fuck you


I would have guessed that gays would make good tenants because they didn't have kids wrecking the place.


They were clean, no complaints there.

But boy were they entitled. Listen tenant, I’m not going to replace a perfectly good working washer because you think that you are entitled to a new green water conserving washing machine. That got old.
44   Ceffer   2022 May 13, 2:29pm  

BayArea says
new green water conserving washing machine. That got old.




Get them a washboard, a tub, and a bar of lye soap, LOL!
46   NuttBoxer   2022 Oct 18, 10:41am  

Sounds like the classic case of buying without vetting the purchase. Happened to my friend also on one of his first rental property purchases. If you're buying rental property, make sure to vet the existing tenants.
47   WookieMan   2022 Oct 18, 10:47am  

NuttBoxer says

Sounds like the classic case of buying without vetting the purchase. Happened to my friend also on one of his first rental property purchases. If you're buying rental property, make sure to vet the existing tenants.

Buy commercial, preferably cash. NNN lease. No emotion and no responsibility in comparison to residential. I'd never do residential rentals again unless it was the deal of a lifetime. People running a business have drive to not fail. Residential tenants know they can fuck you over and it not be a big deal for them.

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